Friday, March 12, 2010

Vanilla Girl

This is one of those songs I wrote while living in my grandparent's basement the summer of 2001. I don't normally talk about those from my past that I dated before I met and married my beautiful wife, but this is where this song comes from. This girl was one of the big reasons I moved away from Utah that summer. I came to a realization that I was be used for reasons I'm still not sure of. I didn't have anything to offer, but for some reason that is what was happening with the relationship. I was pulled this way and that and the madness was starting to settle in. I finally came to the decision that I should move and be completely unreachable by anyone. So one afternoon while my roommates were working or whatever, I just packed up my few possessions and left.

There are a few references in this song as to who this girl was. She was a beauty pageant contestant, hence the references to glitter, fading fame, parades, and the sash she wore her name on. She was too concerned with her appearance and what people thought of her. She didn't really know who she herself was and that was her biggest hinderance in life. Luckily things did not work out with her and I shortly met my future wife after this.

This song is about this girl, but it also about being true to yourself, no matter the cost. Everything goes away eventually, except for those people who are most important to you. Let everything else fade away, but hang on to those important people around you! Otherwise, they may not be there when you need them most.

Trapped inside this notion

You lay out of reach

Slipping through my fingers

Falling at your feet

Must you scratch out my eyes?

Don’t give me that

All your glitter will fade away someday

Your pleasure only brings me pain

And on me you have left your stain

By throwing me away what will you gain?

Vanilla girl

Everywhere I see you

Luscious beauty queen

Do you remember my name?

My methanphetamine

You’re a bad religion

I won’t convert

All your fame will fade away someday

Your pleasure only brings me pain

And on me you have left your stain

By throwing me away what will you gain?

Vanilla girl

The sash you wear your name on

You’ll find will one day be gone

Your one support may cease to be

People won’t remember

You’ll see your last parade

Where will you turn to?

Look what you have made

I’m compelled to hate you

I won’t refuse

Love from me was never meant to stay

Your pleasure only brings me pain

And on me you have left your stain

By throwing me away what will you gain?

Vanilla girl

19 Vanilla Girl.mp3


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pretty legit song man. I like it. The pain Vanilla Girl put you through gave you two things in the end. First and foremost, an end to that relationship and a kick ass wife that swooped in.
Second, a pretty good song!

Camilla said...

ahhh the summer of 2001...
I remember you were a mess and i hated her for making you so misserable! Im glad that you finally met and married a woman that could appretiate you :)